Have you ever felt like you were living a life that wasn’t truly yours? Like every step you took was already mapped out for you—your choices dictated by tradition, expectations, or the silent pressure of “this is how it’s always been done?”
It’s a feeling many experience but few dare to challenge. The world has a way of handing us a script before we even realize we’re acting in someone else’s play. But what if you had the courage to rewrite the story?
The Invisible Chains of Tradition
Tradition is a powerful force. It connects us to our roots, provides a sense of belonging, and offers guidance in a world full of uncertainty. But sometimes, it can also act as an invisible chain, holding us back from stepping into our own truth.
For Tara, growing up in Iran meant a life shaped by cultural expectations—who she should be, how she should act, and what she was allowed to dream of. It wasn’t that her family was unkind; rather, they were bound by the same traditions that had shaped generations before them. But deep down, she knew she wanted something different. She wanted more.
Many of us face this dilemma in our own way. Whether it’s family expectations, societal norms, or even the fear of judgment, the pressure to conform can feel overwhelming. But here’s the thing: the life you were born into doesn’t have to be the life you settle for.
The Moment of Defiance
There comes a moment when you have to ask yourself—am I making these choices because they fulfill me, or because I’m afraid of what will happen if I don’t?
For Tara, that moment came when she was expected to stay within the boundaries set for her. A stable but predictable life, dictated by tradition, lay ahead. But instead of following that path, she took a leap into the unknown. She pursued an education in political science, a field not widely encouraged for women. She carved a space for herself in the diplomatic world, a world where men dominated the conversation. And when her home country’s political climate shifted, threatening to pull her back into conformity, she made the hardest choice of all—she left.
It wasn’t easy. It never is. Choosing your own path often means walking away from comfort, from approval, from the certainty of the familiar. It means standing in the face of criticism and holding firm when people ask, Why would you throw away what’s already laid out for you?
Because it isn’t yours.
The Fear of Stepping into the Unknown
Let’s be honest—breaking free from tradition is terrifying. There’s a reason so many people stay where they are, even when they feel trapped. Stepping into the unknown means risking failure, disappointing others, and facing uncertainty. The fear is real.
Tara felt it too. When she left Iran for Paris, she wasn’t stepping into a perfectly planned future. She was stepping into a world of uncertainty, rejection, and obstacles she couldn’t yet see. Her U.S. visa was denied. She had to return to Iran, facing the very restrictions she had fought so hard to escape. But she didn’t stop there. She found another way. She applied again, this time from Turkey, and finally, the door opened.
The lesson? Fear is not a sign that you should turn back—it’s a sign that you’re on the edge of something new. The only way to move forward is through it.
Carving Out a Life That’s Truly Yours
If you’ve ever questioned whether you’re following your own path or simply the one expected of you, take a moment to ask yourself:
- What do I truly want, beyond what others want for me?
- If fear and judgment weren’t factors, what choices would I make?
- What would it feel like to live a life that was fully my own?
Tara’s story is proof that you don’t have to stay where you were placed. You don’t have to accept limitations just because they’ve been handed to you. The road may be uncertain, and the leap may be terrifying, but the alternative—living a life that doesn’t belong to you—is far worse.
You are allowed to break tradition. You are allowed to walk away from expectations that no longer serve you. And most importantly, you are allowed to carve out a life that is fully and unapologetically yours.
So, the real question is: Will you?